


January Rain

by tealeavesandtrash



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, Ghost David "Dave" Katz, Hurt No Comfort, Klaus Hargreeves Needs A Hug, Klaus Hargreeves-centric, M/M, Post-Season/Series 02, but not actually ghost dave
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-21
Updated: 2021-02-21
Packaged: 2021-03-14 11:00:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,507
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28919463
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tealeavesandtrash/pseuds/tealeavesandtrash
Summary: Enklave Fest 81: HallucinationsPersonally, Klaus doesn't get it. He isn't concerned about some fear-inducing cube, he's been surrounded by fear his whole life - it’s what drove him to alcohol and drugs in the first place. He's so desensitized to it by now that there isn’t anything left that he hasn’t already lived through. What's the worst it could do?
Relationships: Klaus Hargreeves/David "Dave" Katz
Comments: 18
Kudos: 44
Collections: EnKlave Fest 2021





	January Rain

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by [this post](https://carry-on-my-wayward-hobbit.tumblr.com/post/640124337950801920/re-klaus-and-chris-the-fear-inducing-cube-ive) I made a while back about Klaus and Chris the cube which seemed to make a lot of people sad, and when I saw this prompt it seemed like the perfect excuse to combine the two into this little diddy.

Klaus sits quietly on the floor of the motel room that he and his siblings had been staying in for the past week - the most recent in a long list of temporary hideouts they'd been using to evade The Sparrow Academy. It's nothing special; usually lumpy mattresses, mysterious damp stains, and is unnecessarily cramped since someone decided to only shell out for two twin rooms.

The rest of his family were out somewhere at the moment - chasing leads, collecting supplies, fighting bad guys, typical superhero hero bullshit - leaving Klaus alone to guard the briefcase.

The lookout.

Although that position doesn’t bother him as much as it used to, he's too tired to care about getting passed over now. Tired of running, of fighting, of everything. It feels like a lifetime ago since Reginald’s funeral; when he’d flounced about in Allisons’ old clothes and his only cares had been getting his hands as many pawnable trinkets while simultaneously winding up his family. After everything that had happened since that day - Vietnam, two apocalypses, enduring Destiny’s Children, sobriety _,_ losing Dave and then Ben.

It was just … exhausting.

So Klaus doesn’t mind getting left on lookout duty if it means he gets to sit and wallow in self-pity and not have to deal with the Sparrow Academy. (Having this weird alternative version of Ben actively gunning for him is just the cherry on top of the shit show that is the life and times of Klaus Hargeeves.)

But cynicism aside, the peace and quiet isn’t unwelcome. 

Ben had always used to nag Klaus about trying therapy or rehab or just reaching out to one of their siblings and ever since they arrived back from Dallas, the rest of Hargreeves siblings seemed to have the same idea - especially after they'd learnt about the Sparrows' version of Number Seven.

Apparently, an existential dread cube was a great excuse to talk about their feelings. 

Personally, Klaus doesn't get it. He isn't concerned about some fear-inducing cube, what's the worst it could do? Show him the hordes of corpses that he sees whenever he's sober? Or the mausoleum and Dave’s dead body which he see's every time he closed his eyes? That's the thing none of his siblings can seem to grasp, he's been surrounded by fear and death his whole life - it’s what drove him to alcohol and drugs in the first place. He's so desensitized to it by now that there isn’t anything left that he hasn’t already lived through, so what's the point of talking about it?

Klaus huffs in annoyance at the idea alone - he doesn’t need a _therapist_ and he doesn’t need to talk to his siblings about his _emotions_. He needs Dave, who always seemed to know the right to say and who never minded that Klaus was loud and flamboyant and just a little bit eccentric. Dave who just always _got_ Klaus.

But Dave isn’t here, and Klaus has just about given up trying to conjure him. The bitter disappointment after every failed attempt had started to become too much, it's easier to find a little solace in memories.

Klaus lets out a low sigh, eyes drifting closed as he flops his head back against the bed behind him. He fishes out Dave’s dog tags from under his shirt, running his fingers over the familiar embossed lettering absentmindedly as he just lets himself slip away to memories of a better time. Of what had probably been the best week of his life, spent in a hotel room not so different to the room he's in now.

If he tries hard enough, it‘s like he's still there.

The bustling sounds of city life that used to rise up from the streets below, creeping in through the ajar window.

The musky smell that lingered from the cigarettes and joints they shared while they basked in the afterglow of sex.

The trail of goosebumps on Klaus' skin that followed in the path of Dave’s finger as he traced lazy patterns.

Their late-night conversations and the way Dave could coax Klaus to open up about his past without ever holding any judgment.

_“Klaus.”_

The way that Klaus would melt when Dave pulled away from a kiss just to catch his eye and breathe his name.

_“Klaus.”_

Klaus’s eyes snap open.

That voice isn't his head. It's coming from someone else in the room.

It's colder than he remembers. How come he didn't notice the temperature drop until now?

“Klaus.”

The voice is more desperate this time. Klaus knows exactly who it is, the voice is unmistakable. He takes a shaky breath to steady himself, just in case his mind is playing tricks on him, before slowly glancing over.

And there he is. Just as Klaus remembered - army fatigues muddied from the jungle; messy dark blonde curls and blue eyes fixed on him.

“Dave?” It comes out as barely a whisper. This feels like a dream and for a moment Klaus doesn’t move for fear of shattering the illusion.

And then Dave takes a step closer and Klaus is scrambling to his feet, heart pounding as he rushes across the room until the two of them are standing toe to toe.

The moment seems to stretch out forever as Klaus lifts a tentative to Dave's face, gently running his fingers down his cheeks and along his jawline just like he’d done all those years ago in the backroom of that Vietnamese club.

“Oh my god, Dave” he lets out a watery laugh. “You’re here, I did it.”

After all those failed attempts to conjure Dave, all those nights choking on his own tears when he realised he’d failed again. He’d done it. He’d finally, _finally_ done it. Even if it was an accident, Klaus doesn't care, Dave is here, in the flesh - or close enough.

Dave keeps his eyes on Klaus, reaching up to grasp his wrist, keeping Klaus’ hands cupped on his face. Klaus tilts his head, leaning up to capture Dave's lips in a kiss. He can't keep the grin from his face at the familiar sensation of his chapped lips against Dave's. 

Klaus has never been one for romantic cliches, never been one romance full stop, but this moment feels like magic. The same flush of anxious butterflies followed by a rush of giddy excitement, just like the very first kiss they’d shared in Saigon.

He pulls away ever so slightly to meet Dave’s eye, still close enough that their noses brush and for him to feel Dave's warm breath against his lips.

_(Is that normal for ghosts? He's never paid close enough attention before and there are more important things at hand now.)_

Klaus lets out a content hum, running his fingers Dave’s hair, absorbing every tiny detail of this moment in case it disappears. “I missed you,” he whispers. “God, I missed you so much, Dave you have no idea.” He moves his hands, wrapping one arm around the back of Dave's neck and letting the other come to rest gently on his chest, anchoring himself to Dave and to this moment.

“I missed you too, Klaus,” Dave whispers as he moves his hand to Klaus’ hip, holding him close.

Klaus isn’t sure how long they stand like this, but he doesn’t care. He could stay in this moment, sharing chaste kisses and oblivious to the problems of the outside world.

“Where’d you go?” Dave asks eventually, breaking the comfortable silence.

Klaus hums, contemplating how to phrase everything. “That’s kinda a long story," he starts. "I went back to my family. Then on a solo trip all around the country, then to Dallas to try and find you, and now we’re back here with my family again.” Klaus doesn’t want to dwell on the past or his family right now, he just wants to focus on Dave and nothing else. But if Dave wants to know then he deserves an explanation at the very least.

“I woke up in ‘nam, I was standing over my own body and you were gone,” Dave speaks slowly, quietly. “I couldn’t find you. I looked everywhere for you, why couldn’t you stay?”

Klaus sighs, dropping his gaze but keeping himself firmly pressed against Dave's body. “It’s complicated, Davey. I wasn’t meant to be in Vietnam, I wasn’t meant to be in that _time period_ and I couldn’t stay there alone, not without you. I had to - I had to go home. Back to my time.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t know how to, baby.”

“You had ten months to tell,” Dave pushes with a slight bitterness that catches Klaus off guard.

He pulls back slightly so he can look Dave in the eye properly. “I didn’t know how, I - I didn’t think you’d believe me -”

“You could have _proved it_.” Any hint of softness has now gone from Dave’s voice. It isn’t a tone Klaus has ever heard, one with bite and anger that makes Klaus reel back.

“I’m sorry, I -”

Dave pulls away properly, taking a step back. His eyes narrow. “You _left_ me.”

“I tried to save, David I swear! I - I did everything I could.” Klaus stammers over his words. He can feel hot tears welling up in his eyes, anxiety bubbling up in his stomach.

This isn’t how it was meant to go.

He's always known deep down that if he did conjure Dave, things wouldn’t just slip back into place like they were in Vietnam. He always expected there to be heavy conversations at some point about how things had happened.

But this - the anger and the resentment is something Klaus never anticipated.

He feels sick.

There's a distant bang and then sounds of an argument break nearby. They're muffled by the thin walls of the motel and Klaus doesn't pay them any attention, he can barely focus on his own thoughts over the hammering in his chest.

Dave's gaze darkens. "You could have done more."

"I tried!" Klaus is begging now, hot tears streaming down his cheeks as he does so. "I found you in Dallas, I tried to stop you enlisting, I told you everything, David - I did _everything._ "

There’s a sudden crash as the door bursts open with a shout, but Klaus ignores it. The drumming of his heartbeat echoing in his ears as he just stumbles forward again, trying desperately to touch Dave, to get him to listen, to make him understand.

“David, baby, _please_. There wasn’t anything I could have done - I _swear_.” He struggles to even get the words out, pushing desperately through choked sobs that keep bubbling up from his chest. “I love you, you have to listen to me, I love you. I tried everything - you have to believe me!”

There are more shouts in the background and someone grabs his arm.

“Klaus they found us, we need to go, _now_.”

It’s Diego. That much registers in his mind, but Klaus can’t concentrate. He pulls desperately against his brother's firm grip, trying to reach Dave who steps back again, just out of arm's reach.

“No, no, no, I can’t leave, please Dave you have come with me!” he pleads frantically.

There’s another crash and a shout from Five. Diego’s grip on him tightens as he starts dragging him towards the door. Klaus thrashes against him in a futile effort to stay.

“Let me go, Diego! Dave, please - _please_ don’t do this, I’m sorry!” The words are tumbling out his mouth like a waterfall, Klaus can’t even think what he’s saying as he lets all his emotions pour out into begging pleas. “I tried everything, Dave, you have to listen to me I swear! I’m sorry I failed - I did everything, Don’t do this David, please I love you - I _need_ you!”

Dave doesn’t move, just keeps a cold gaze fixed on Klaus.

The moment seems to stretch out forever as Klaus fails against his brother before he finally opens his mouth to speak.

“Then why did you let me die?”

His voice is hollow, devoid of any emotion at all. It cuts through Klaus like a knife.

The words leave him slack and gaping, unable to process what he's just heard.

He can’t think, can’t move, his mind goes blank.

He just stares aimlessly at Dave as he's pulled from the room.

Those seven words play on a loop as he keeps his gaze fixed on the plush headliner of the car, head lolled against the back of his seat. The initial shock has worn off, now his chest aches with emptiness, and his cheeks feel tight from the dried tear tracks.

He wants to scream, smash something, get drunk, get high, watch the world burn.

He hasn’t felt this way since - well since he arrived back from Vietnam in the first place, but somehow it’s even worse this time.

It's his fault, it was all his fault.

Of course, those thoughts had crept into his mind after he got back, Ben had spent months drilling it in that they had been in the middle of a war, Klaus couldn't have known or done anything, that it wasn't his fault. After a while, Klaus had let himself believe it. 

But Dave blamed him, held it against Klaus for not doing more when he had the chance. To hear it from Dave's own lips - it was earthshattering. And the worst part was that Dave was right, they could have left together at any point, but Klaus didn't. He was a coward, refusing to consider the briefcase as an option because it meant telling Dave the truth, the _whole_ truth, and Klaus had been too scared. In the same way he ran to drugs instead of facing his powers, he'd paid the price for his cowardice with Dave's life.

His blood is on Klaus' hands.

He feels Diego gently nudge him in the arm, dragging him from his spiraling thoughts. The two of them are sat together in the back of the car, the rest of their siblings in the middle and front. It feels slightly more private, almost like the row of seats in front creates some sort of barrier which Klaus is thankful for, even if he knows deep down the rest of them will be listening intently to any conversation he has.

“That soldier in the motel, was that him? The one you lost?” Diego asks in a low voice.

Klaus gives a slow nod. “Yeah, that was Da- that was him,” he croaks, voice raw. He can’t even bring himself to say Dave's name, knowing it’ll just tip him over the edge again.

Diego is silent for a few minutes before speaking up again. “You know it wasn’t real, right? The Sparrow Academy tracked us down, it was Christopher doing his weird nightmare thing. What he said, about it being your fault, it wasn’t him.”

Klaus lets out a low sigh, moving his head to rest against the window, staring aimlessly at the landscape speeding by.

“Doesn’t matter,” he mutters. “It was all true.”

**Author's Note:**

> Editing and reediting this physically hurt my heart, so your welcome I guess  
> also [ hmu on tumblr ](https://carry-on-my-wayward-hobbit.tumblr.com/) if you fancy


End file.
